Lifting Up My Eyes

So, I definitely should be working, but... you ever get those times where things just 'click'? Now is one of those. I was listening to a podcast of a sermon by K.P. Yohannan. If you don't know who that is, he is the founder of Gospel for Asia, a truly amazing ministry. He's also written several books, all of which I recommend. Now, in some ways, it feels so cheap and hypocritical to say all this. I'm not perfect, I will mess up, probably a lot. But I hope in sharing this, it helps someone, and that we would all realize it's about progressing that relationship with Christ. He is always willing to forgive, we have to accept that, and move past our sin and mistakes.

I'm going to be very honest and transparent here. I've never been at a place so far in my life as hard, painful, crazy as it is right now. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps I've bitten off more than I can chew, maybe not. This summer is going to be unreal, I have no idea what I'm doing after that (I hope and pray it's Moody, but I'm not sure yet), and there are a many other things on my mind and heart that just make me feel weary, and tired. Now this is a dangerous place to be at. There's nothing wrong with feeling weary, tired, busy, even down. Paul was depressed, even Jesus struggled (in fact, more so than any human ever has, or ever will), but their reactions were Holy. It is a constant struggle for me, every day, to keep the right focus, to hold on to Jesus. And I might have to admit, I'm losing. Or, was.

John chapter four.

31In the mean while the disciples prayed him, saying, Rabbi, eat. 32But he said unto them, I have meat to eat that ye know not. 33The disciples therefore said one to another, Hath any man brought him aught to eat? 34Jesus saith unto them, My meat is to do the will of him that sent me, and to accomplish his work. 35Say not ye, There are yet four months, and then cometh the harvest? behold, I say unto you, Lift up your eyes, and look on the fields, that they are white already unto harvest.

THIS is the correct perspective, looking at the world as Jesus did. Did you catch it? Jesus was so moved by the woman at the well, and the darkness that was in Samaria, that He lost his appetite. When is the last time I was so moved by the fact that people around me do not know Jesus, that I had no desire to eat? That's crazy! I'm so wrapped up in my own thoughts, emotions, desires, that I simply live life and most of the time forget that we're in a war, actually, that Christ even died. We all know and say that He died and rose again, but do we act like it? I know a lot of the time, I don't.

Christ begs his disciples here... Lift up your eyes! See the world as I see it, notice the lost people, and be moved by it, allow it to make you weep, to hurt you, so that you actually care more about them than you do yourself. Keep that in mind, do not let yourself be distracted by what you will eat, what you wear, the things on this earth that don't matter. Live a life that will make a difference in eternity.

That is what I need to do, every single day. It is so easy to lose sight of the goal, of the cross, of Christ, but we must not!

Oh God, tear my heart... let me see the world as you see it, let me love as Christ loved, allow me to care less about myself, and more about the people around me. I give up the things and priorities of this earth, I want to make a difference.